What IF:

I recall my college days or is that daze? My school required all students enroll in a few general education (GE) classes. These classes are irrelevant to a person’s major but a school decides they are vital for balance and variety for all students to take. Looking back on this seems very silly to me that I had to take those classes now. The bulk of these general education classes were a useless waste of time since not a single one of these classes proved to be beneficial to me upon graduation to the real world. Oh sure, I am able to answer a few more questions on Jeopardy which my statistics class gave about 1000 to one odds of being on and I trounce my friends in a board game called Trivial Pursuit that comes in many "flavors". But all in all, those general education classes have not been much help. Sorry Dean Beansomean, but the Art History class I signed up for has not in the least bit assisted me with life’s challenges or allowed me to earn any extra money. Now that I’m well over a decade out of college, I have come to the stark naked realization that there are several classes that certainly could have proved to be beneficial had they been offered. Alas these useful, practical and go-worthy classes do not exist at 99% of college campuses. I have come to the stark naked realization that 99% of the time, we have to learn on the fly when it comes to some of life’s biggest challenges as demonstrated in the proverbial "school of hard knocks". Not that there is a "College of Boxing", there is none. It certainly would have been acutely beneficial, even nice, to have some high level instruction and guidance on the issues below. (HINT TO BILL GATES and his BILLION$!) Below are listed a few college courses that every college or university or maybe HIGH SCHOOL should offer! Expectant Parents 101 Discovering by "word of mouth" that one is going to be a father for the first time can be REALLY overwhelming. This is basically because a dude has no clue what the **BLEEP** he is doing. Hopefully, the love-making was careful for a long time if not vigorous and spontaneously exciting! There is so much to learn and no one ever gives you any real sort of advice other than advising that life as you know it, is over. So many questions! Such as, how do I deal with my pregnant wife? What direly necessary things should I purchase before the "Expected Time of Arrival" comes? How do I locate a fine, upstanding, highly rated pediatrician? Should I preserve and store the umbelical cord (blood cord) when the baby is born? Should I gaze upon my wife’s vagina as she’s birthing? I could ramble on like Woody Gutherie on a freight train in California but there are hundreds of questions a first-time father could and should ask SOMEBODY. Doubtless, this class would be beneficial to a boatload of people and it might even terrify a few youths from having unprotected, spontaneous, vigorous, loin-locking, bump-and-grind sex, saving lots of unwanted pregnancies and preventing the spread of Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs). A more advanced 200 level course could follow the Expectant Parents class that would focus on and highlight some of the challenges that happen after the baby arrives. Baby On the Way or Not -- Wedding Planning When planning a wedding, you and your fiance are going to have a lot of decisions to discuss. You should select a wedding venue, choose between a DJ or band, hire a photographer, hire a florist, decide the size of the wedding party, who is in the wedding posse, and much, much more (AKA MUCHO, MUCHO MAS!). Good advice as to what options are worth spending the extra money and how to eliminate unnecessary waste and be better off cutting back. These days people can sign up with Target or other stores on weding gift suggestions so people do not all buy you and the bride the same identical things that have to be returned to the store. This is highly beneficial to the store also so MANY of them do this. You may have to call them or go there and ASK. Everybody should know what to register for and wedding day do’s and dont’s. Dudes could also benefit from a lesson on buying an engagement ring. I was UNLEARNED and JUST PLAIN IGNORANT when I bought my wife an engagement ring and it probably WASTED a lot of money I could have placed in stuff we needed. Does your bride lose things a lot? May you should consider a 10 carat gold band ONLY or a 10 carat gold band with a cubic zarconia (CZ) of a quarter carat or so. Avoid a BIG stone since THAT will make it look FAKE. A quarter carat is about 1/4th inch. The MEGA Challenge of Home Buying and Home Repair Still another challenge that most people are ignorant about and don’t learn anything about beforehand is HB and HR. Absolutely NOBODY, especially the real estate person getting a FAT commission, warns you what you are getting yourself into when buying a home. There is no advice about the best way to obtain a loan or how to spot POTENTIAL PROBLEMS when eye-balling homes. Naturally, no one gave CRITICAL advice on the best way to negotiate a price with the seller or how much to expect to pay in closing costs. Only when I was going through the process of buying a home did I learn all the things I needed to know. Purchasing a home turned out to be a very stressful experience. This was stress that COULD have been lessened had I been prepared by the "Wise-acre Buys a Home" college course. Needless to say, another advanced class could instruct in basic home repair. How do you repair a leaky sink? How can you paint a room like a professional without getting it all ovewr the trim and floors? How do you install drywall or change a thermostat? These are just a few basic skills I wish I had learned prior to owning a home. Instead, I wasted my time taking three required credits of Philosophy AKA "Philo-Sophy", may she rest in peace (RIP). "Stuff" Happens 101 The "Stuff" Happens 101 class would prepare you for all the untoward CRAPPY situations you are likely to encounter in life, while also helping you to dodge and avoid them. Two examples of a situation that might need better preparation or anticipation to ward off constipation. Those Insurance-related issues When driving one should ALWAYS be insured. If the car is sort of OLD just get the COLLISION and forget the COMPREHENSIVE (COMP) that would give you a couple of hundred dollars for a TOTALLED HEAP OF JUNK to put down on another used car. If buying it NEW, the BANK or NOTE carrier who lends you the money WILL REQUIRE "COMP and collision" since the CAR or truck is NEW and worth a lot. This is YOUR COMP money protecting THEIR investment! Like the ad on TV, they usually pay about 70-80% even if you get "T-boned" or totalled in the side (Forming a "T"). Knock on your wooden head, suppose you have a car accident. What steps do you take immediately following a car accident? You better HOPE it was not private property, because THAT was a parking lot accident NOT covered by MOST insurance. On the street, TRADE INSURANCE INFO. Did the person flee the scene? Get their licence number (car-tag). Got away too quickly/ It was a "hit and run". Hopefully 3 people are NOT DEAD and 22 injured as was SXSW, a Muslim-related crash. In the event of a serious accident, how much insurance is necessary for coverage so that my assets are protected? What coverage for my home and auto is necessary and what is a waste of money? How about umbrella policies? What about life insurance? How much life insurance coverage do I get? Is term or whole life better (Term because it is not building a "nest-egg" to give you back in the unlikelihood that you allow it to "mature" in 20 years!?!?) The $28 per month for 1/4 million$ on the radio is TERM. Suppose You Lose your job, as in terminated, laid off. Just got fired and you have a mortgage and two kids and very little money saved up? What steps can you take to keep afloat until you can get another job? There are plenty of other untoward or CRAPPY situations in life that a person could be far better prepared for. The "Get a Job...bla-la-la-la" class would be sure to help. The Job Interviewing Class Some schools DO offer this class. You may even know someone who took it in college and said it was the only class they actually used in their professional career. Needless to say, this should be a mandatory class. Youthful students are coming out of college totally clueless as to the right steps on interviews. A HIGH percentage. As an Human Relations (HR) who interviews a lot of college interns , that has been seen by me firsthand. I constantly see kids completely unprepared, who know nothing about the organization they are interviewing to work for and even worse, MOST are clueless as to HOW to WORK and KEEP a job. Many don’t even dress properly and many who don’t send thank you or even **BLEEP YOU** notes, not that I get presidential with them. Many peoples' applications are full of blanks and smeared and erased answers. Oftimes their resumes are so poorly crafted, they are passed over for even an interview. Since the "higher education" obtained at a college or university is supposed to prepare students for their careers, it only makes sense that "The Job Interviewing Class" would be required for all students. But MOST of these "institutions of higher learning" do not give the proverbial rat's patootie. This class would have been a lot more useful than the nine credits of something useless required at the school I attended. Sorry, but it’s true, EEWW, so true. Tags: college home job interview parenting weddings left to right: Dr. Ernst Stuhlinger, Major General Holger Toftoy, Professor Herman Oberth, Dr. Wernher von Braun and Dr. Robert Lusser.